~ Recipe For Love ~

by

Cheryl Pereira

Jealousy rose like bile in Michael’s throat. Laura laughed. He could see Kashmira tug at Joshua’s arm. His brother waved to him and Laura. Kashmira refused to meet Michael’s eyes. A huge roaring sound filled his ears. He didn’t acknowledge their good-byes. He led Laura back in the lounge, depositing her with his mother and aunts to exchange small talk. His mind remained miles away, his heart hammered one name, and his lips remembered one taste--Kashmira’s. Michael knew he was in deep trouble. He needed to do something about it, but what?

On a sudden impulse he left the room and jogged to the driveway. He could hear Josh and Kashmira giggling. Just as he opened the door for Kashmira, Michael called out to him. "Hey Josh, wait up."

Kashmira swung around quickly. Josh turned his head. "What’s up, bro?"

"You got a call from Ruskin. He mentioned it might be important," he said, anxious to have Josh believe him. Ruskin was the Chief Operations officer of his security firm.

"Ruskin called now?" In a flash, his brother’s tone became businesslike.

He nodded, schooling his expression to appear non-committal and crossed his finger behind his back childishly.

"Shall I tell him to call later?"

"No, that’s fine. I’ll take it now." He turned to Kashmira. "Can you wait for some time? This call may take seconds or a couple of minutes. I don’t have my cell phone today."

"No problem, Josh. I’ll drop Kashmira home," answered Michael before Kashmir could reply.

His brother gazed at him, questions rife in his eyes. A light bulb clicked on. Amusement flickered in his brown depths and a smile threatened his chiseled lips. After a few charged moments he swung his head to look at Kashmira. "Is that okay with you?"

Kashmira’s cheeks blazed with warmth. "I don’t mind. If it isn’t too much trouble for Michael."

"No trouble at all," answered Michael, relief coursing through him. His brother guessed it was a ruse. He’d have to deal with the teasing later. Right now, his goal was accomplished.

Joshua shrugged. "Well, if all parties seem okay, who am I to insist otherwise?" Throwing Michael a mischievous look, he hugged Kashmira. "I’ll see you Friday, okay?"

Kashmira nodded in silence.

Joshua tossed his BMW keys at Michael and called a goodbye before he strolled back toward the house.

The silence stretched. Kashmira avoided Michael’s gaze.

"Well, shall we leave?"

Kashmira nodded.

He held the door open for her and she slid in and waited for him.

Michael got in and switched on the ignition. Kashmira’s scent teased his nostrils. His heart beat too fast. He felt all of fifteen, sitting next to the girl of his dreams.

"There wasn’t any phone call, was there?" Kashmira’s sudden question broke the charged silence.

"Was I that transparent?"

"You’re not very good at lying. You’re eyes gave you away."

"You don’t mind?"

"Not really. I’m flattered."

A warm feeling infused him. The silence stretched. Kashmira shifted in her seat.

He took a deep breath. "I’m sorry, Kashmira. I truly am."

She swung around to look at him, her eyes wide. "For what?"

"You must think me a jerk--especially after what happened in your kitchen and how I left you yesterday. I haven’t behaved too well. Neither was I any better today, back in the hallway. I-I’m not very good this."

"What? What are you apologizing for?"

Michael sighed. "You look beautiful," he blurted out.

"So, you’re apologizing because I look beautiful?" she teased. "How you can think that, I don’t know. With all the stains on my clothes and my disheveled hair?"

He took his eyes of the road to glance at her. "You’re beautiful. Disheveled or not. I wanted to spend some time with you but didn’t know how to."

"Because of the blond lady by your side?"

His hands tightened on the wheel. "Laura. Yes, to an extent and because I would have wanted to punch any man who so much as complimented you."

She gasped, and then burst into giggles. "Is this how you feel about all your friends?"

"No, only you."

His stark confession cut off her giggles. Kashmira bit her lip.

Michael wanted so much to taste her again. To nibble on their fullness. His manhood swelled, and a stab of longing speared his soul. He flexed his fingers on the steering wheel. "I’m sorry, I can’t help it. You do funny things to me." He turned on to her street and cruised to a halt in front of her house.

Kashmira didn’t break the silence. He switched off the ignition and waited. The silence thickened and swirled inside the intimate cocoon of the car. Michael glanced at the deserted streets. Most of the houses were in darkness. Families bedded down for the night. Parent’s tucking their kids in, and preparing to spend some quality adult time together. Again, the stab of longing lanced through his soul. Images of Kashmira and him doing just that unfolded in his mind, in full-blown color. His heart rate picked up and he had a difficult time banishing the image.

"I-I don’t know what to say," stammered Kashmira.

Michael shook his head. "I have the same trouble. When it comes to you, all the wrong things come out. I want us to be friends but at the same time I want something more."

She faced him. "Is Laura your girlfriend?"

"She’s someone I have been dating for a while, but yes, you can all her that."

"Is it serious?"

"I thought it was--but after you fell into my arms..." he shrugged. "It doesn’t feel like it is. I don’t know," confessed Michael, surprising himself with his honest confession.

"But--but, I’m still wrong for you, right?" Kashmira asked with point blank directness.

Michael drummed his fingers on the steering wheel. "I don’t know how to answer that. In so many ways you’re perfect for me." He attempted a smile but his lips would not comply. "I need you, Kashmira. In ways that I don’t even understand but I’ve walked that route before. Love isn’t part of my vocabulary anymore. My head tells me you’re not what I need. Something inside me doesn’t agree."

"Your heart tells you different?"

Michael nodded. "I want to trust it. More than you’ll know, but I can’t. It’s let me down once."

Kashmira sighed and glanced out of the window to her house. "Looks like we’re at a stalemate. There’s nothing I can do to change your mind."

Pain shot through him at her stark statement. "No, I... give me time."

She swung around to face him. "How much time would that be, Michael? How about I invest all my emotions in the hope you’ll come around and it doesn’t happen. You still walk away. Who is going to mend my heart while yours is encased in Teflon?"

"I don’t want to hurt you. I would never want that."

"Yeah, well it doesn’t always work that way," she answered in clipped tones. "Besides, this conversation is moot. You’ve got Laura."

"I know and until that is resolved it’s unfair to you both. I’m not entitled to ask you for anything." He ran his fingers through his hair. "I’ll sort it out--my relationship with Laura. Give us a chance, Kashmira. Give me a chance."

She moved to open the door and stopped. "I’m willing to, Michael, but I need to see you take the first step. I’m fresh out of protective gear and I’m not sure I have the strength to tango with your brand of a relationship--unless you’re willing to give a hundred percent."

She unlocked the door and strode toward the house. Her hurried footsteps echoed on the path. Michael followed her and swung her around to face him as she reached the door. "Kashmira, wait. I-I can’t leave it like this. I will try. I promise." His hand rose to caress her cheek.

Kashmira closed her eyes. "Don’t, Michael. Don’t start something you’ll regret," she whispered.

Moments passed. Only the sound of their breathing fractured the charged silence. Kashmira’s eyelashes fluttered open.

"I won’t. I just needed to touch you." He dropped his hands and shoved them into his back pockets. "Are you still going out with Joshua?"

Kashmira stiffened. "Yes."

Jealousy wormed its way in his heart.

Kashmira’s lips curled into a cynical smile. "What you want doesn’t matter. It would, if you and I had a relationship other than that of being just friends." She shrugged. "I’m a free agent. I can see whom I please. If you want something from me, you better work for it. I’m not going to fall into your lap quite so easily."

‘‘Well, feel free to rub my face in it, why don’t you?’’ Anger wormed its way through his heart, even though he knew it was irrational. He stepped back. Away from her so he wouldn’t reach for her and kiss her silly like he wanted to. "I know you won’t just fall into my lap." He gazed at the star studded sky. "I never thought you would and I don’t expect you to." Michael shrugged his shoulders compelled to be honest in the face of her determined gaze. "I don’t like you seeing someone else, hate the thought of another man touching you, making you smile, tasting your lips. I hate it--I hate it and I don’t know why. I hardly have that right but I don’t care." His hands clenched into fists. "I can’t forget your taste, your smile, your scent--in my mind, it’s all for me. Only for me." He stopped, he couldn’t say more. He feared the intense feelings inside him, the clawing desire in his gut. Instead, he grit his teeth and forced a smile on his lips. "I better leave. If I stand here much longer, I’ll have you pressed up against that door and tasting those very lips that tempted me all last night, all day today and on the ride over."

Kashmira nodded in silence, even as her cheeks flushed a delicate pink, no doubt remembering their explosive kiss just as he was. Unable to stop himself, he grasped her hand and turned it. Bending low, he brushed a kiss on her palm.

Kashmira flinched.

Michael deliberately kissed each one of her fingers, reveling in the warmth of her skin. His mouth craved the taste of her while his swollen manhood begged to be buried in her hot, silken sheath. He muffled a groan and let go of her hand, barely in control of his desires. "Bye, Sweetheart. Sleep tight." Turning he left her standing at her doorstep, his mind in utter chaos.